HELP!! How to ask a girl out with a simple witty Python code??

[Steven D'Aprano]

Ben Finney wrote:

> Steven D'Aprano <steve+comp.lang.python at pearwood.info> writes:
> 
>> Ben Finney wrote:
>>
>> > sohcahtoa82 at gmail.com writes:
>> > 
>> >> I should have known better than to make a joke on this mailing
>> >> list. Someone is bound to get their panties all up in a bunch.
>> > 
>> > You should have known better than to make gendered slurs. Claiming
>> > “it was a joke” doesn't alter the sexism of your remarks. Cut that
>> > out.
>>
>> "You're asking a bunch of nerds for dating advice?"
> 
> “get their panties all up in a bunch” is a gendered slur. 

Ah, sorry about misunderstanding you. It wasn't clear to me that you were
referring to that specific comment rather than the original comment.


> It is implying 
> the person is female, as though the person should feel insulted by that.
> It uses the female gender as an insult.

Why do you interpret that as insulting to women merely on the basis of being
*female*?

Wearing panties/knickers is something anyone can do, of any gender and
sexual orientation. "Panties in a bunch" (or "knickers in a twist") is a
put-down on the basis of excessive sensitivity, not femaleness.

It seems to me that far from challenging sexual stereotypes, mainstream
feminist thought actually *reinforces* it: as evidence, you assumed that
only women wear panties, therefore any reference to panty-wearing is
therefore a slur on women.

It's only gender specific if you accept the sexist gendered stereotype that
all women are by definition thin-skinned and excessively sensitive. The
women I know are nothing like that, and consequently most of them are quite
happy to use "knickers in a twist" as a *non-gendered* put-down on the
basis of perceived behaviour, not sex.

It seems to my wife, and I agree with her, that mainstream feminism has lost
its way and is no longer about gender equality, but is now about enforcing
a neo-Victorian pseudo-politeness where nobody ever has to be exposed to
anything uncomfortable or that threatens to disturb them out of their
comfort zone. Hence the focus on codes of conduct, so-called "safe places",
trigger warnings and the like. Once upon a time, a safe place meant
somewhere where a battered woman could take shelter from her batterer. Now,
it apparently means a way to ostracise an actor for his personal religious
beliefs. (I'm referring to the Internet storm-in-a-teacup over Adam Baldwin
at Supanova.)

I do not buy into that philosophy, and neither do most of the woman I know.



-- 
Steven