Cookie fucking problem

[Ned Batchelder]

On 10/28/13 11:07 AM, Antoon Pardon wrote:
> Op 28-10-13 15:38, Chris Angelico schreef:
>> >On Tue, Oct 29, 2013 at 1:33 AM, Grant Edwards<invalid at invalid.invalid>  wrote:
>>> >>On 2013-10-28, Steven D'Aprano<steve at pearwood.info>  wrote:
>>> >>
>>>> >>>Chris is not baiting Nikos, he is giving him useful information that
>>>> >>>unfortunately Nikos doesn't want to hear.
>>> >>
>>> >>So he's replying to Nikos with responses that aren't helping Nikos and
>>> >>just encourage more posts from Nikos.  I'm sure the_intent_  is
>>> >>different than Mark's, but unfortunately, the result is identical.
>> >
>> >I still maintain that I'm not*baiting*  him, though.
> I don't care. Maybe you can find some semantical rule, that will
> give your behaviour an other etiket than "baiting", in the end
> the effect on the list is the same, with Nikos feeling entitled
> to insist to get an answer.
>
> And if we want this to be a welcoming community, then we have to
> care about the effects and not about the semantical category. So
> should you want this to be a welcoming community, then you are
> focussing on the wrong point.
>

I agree it is probably best to err on the side of ignoring Nikos. But 
there is a distinction between (say) Chris' response and Mark's.  The 
effect on Nikos is the same, but the effect on other readers, especially 
readers new to the list, is very different.

We've already seen a few new people explicitly asking, "is this what 
usually happens on this list?" and they weren't referring to the 
Chris-style response, they were referring to the Mark-style response.

If we want this to be a welcoming community, we have to understand that 
there are many more readers than there are authors, and the impression 
we make on them matters too.  Responding negatively, no matter how 
humorously, is not going to improve the group.  It might amuse the 
regulars, but it is not building a strong and welcoming community.  I 
also happen to think that responding negatively won't even achieve its 
stated purpose of making the help-vampire go away.

--Ned.
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